Seen in Print

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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Wed Aug 17, 2016 5:08 pm

robert. wrote:Can you help my uncle jack off a horse. Incorrect punctuation and capitals.


I'll pass. He's your Uncle. You help him!
What if lollipops moaned every time we licked them?
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webenda
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby webenda » Wed Aug 17, 2016 5:13 pm

Animal semen collector (Salary range: $17,000-$54,000)
The sperm of various animals is a necessary ingredient in artificial insemination, but it’s not like a dairy bull can just walk into a private room with the latest Playbull in his hooves and walk out with a sample for the Mrs. That bull needs a hand, as do horses, pigs, goats, and even turkeys (who are notorious for low libido).
----Wayne----

Back when I was growing up, if you didn't start someth'n, there wouldn't be noth'n.
--Merle Haggard
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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:07 pm

I'll pass - already have enough paying jobs.
What if lollipops moaned every time we licked them?
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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:22 pm

Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
robert. wrote:Can you help my uncle jack off a horse. Incorrect punctuation and capitals.


I'll pass. He's your Uncle. You help him!

Add a hyphen, Robert, between jack and off, and a question mark at the end, and you will have the effect I imagine you are looking for.

Otherwise, with no changes in punctuation , we'd be happy to help your uncle dismount the horse. :mrgreen:
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robert.
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby robert. » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:29 pm

Can you help my Uncle Jack off a horse?
I spend entirely too many hours a day tying my shoes
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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:35 pm

robert. wrote:Can you help my Uncle Jack off a horse?

Yes, I can. (Capitalizing the "U"
and the "J"
helped with clarity.)
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robert.
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby robert. » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:55 pm

Can you help him dig the hole ? After you off the horse he'll need a burial place.
I spend entirely too many hours a day tying my shoes
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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Wed Aug 17, 2016 6:57 pm

robert. wrote:Can you help him dig the hole ? After you off the horse he'll need a burial place.

No, horses can be quite friendly after you've been helpful to them. Or so I've heard. :mrgreen:
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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:07 pm

MurphOnMillerAve wrote:No, horses can be quite friendly...........


Except with those that they are genetically predisposed to dislike with a passion........ :roll: :roll: :oops: :oops: :?
What if lollipops moaned every time we licked them?
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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:27 pm

Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
MurphOnMillerAve wrote:No, horses can be quite friendly...........


Except with those that they are genetically predisposed to dislike with a passion........ :roll: :roll: :oops: :oops: :?

Ohhhh, well that explains a lot. I can see why a couple encounters were less than optimum for me.
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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:29 pm

MurphOnMillerAve wrote:
Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
MurphOnMillerAve wrote:No, horses can be quite friendly...........


Except with those that they are genetically predisposed to dislike with a passion........ :roll: :roll: :oops: :oops: :?

Ohhhh, well that explains a lot. I can see why a couple encounters were less than optimum for me.


Horses hate me...... I keep my distance and do nothing to give them a chance to close that gap.
What if lollipops moaned every time we licked them?
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J. S. Bach
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby J. S. Bach » Wed Aug 17, 2016 7:43 pm

Mmmf, the only good thing that I can say about horses is that properly prepared, they taste good.
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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Wed Aug 17, 2016 10:27 pm

On one occasion, I slapped one hard across the face.
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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Thu Aug 18, 2016 7:18 am

Image
What if lollipops moaned every time we licked them?
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Big Jim
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Re: Seen in Print

Postby Big Jim » Thu Aug 18, 2016 7:52 am

Which begs the question..."Who's Maid Marion?"
And who here remembers the answer?
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