Hobo Jungle

[gtfan]

I just got back from seeing the Lightning tromp the Penguins 4-1. Nice to see after our 8-2 loss the other night against the Devils.

[Tramp]

Pete, what's "shake drill"? Any incoming flights yet?

I can't wait to do our tree. My favorite part of Christmas.

[2railjon]

Claw is our master. Claw will decide who will leave and who will stay.

[MartyE]

I just got back from seeing the Lightning tromp the Penguins 4-1.

You realize that my grandma in a wheel chair could beat the Penquins right?

[P&R Pete]

Shake, drill, and wrap.
I was sent on errands, missed the airport.

Um diddle diddle diddle,
um diddle ay,
hobo birthday
coming our way.

[Tramp]

Drill what? FOR FUCKSAKES.

Who got the ariaport?

[gtfan]

You realize that my grandma in a wheel chair could beat the Penquins right?

Yes, of course. So could my grandma and she's dead.

However, even though you're just a big fish in a little pond, you still get to eat the little fish.

It doesn't say "Only those wins against teams other than the Penguins qualify you for the playoffs."

[P&R Pete]

Tramp, your prostate. You get a free trans-urethral resection with every tree.

The TREE!
They drill...the...DAMN.....TREE!!

Of course, they shake it, first.

[P&R Pete]

Knowhutimean?

[Tramp]

Drill the tree. For the spike? Damn, things are weird down there. And why shake the bloody thing? It shakes enough in the wind, don't it? Up here we just cut and trim them.

And get your mind off that other stuff. Really, it's for the best.

[P&R Pete]

Yupper.
They have this jig that suspends the tree, so it's 'balanced' up and down, then a clamp closes around the trunk, and a conical drill-bit comes up into the deadwood at the core.
The treestand has a conical metal spike in the middle. No more 'goring' of the tree with the four screw-bolts comng in from the side.

It's surprisingly stable.

No small thing, when all the decorations wind up on one side of the tree.

[2railjon]

Ahhh!! The wonders of science.

[San Diegan]

And as he carried the spiked tree and pulled the wagon home, Petey was heard warbling out

[Maria:]
High on a hill was a lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Loud was the voice of the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

Folks in a town that was quite remote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
Lusty and clear from the goatherd's throat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[the Children:]
O ho lay dee odl lee o, o ho lay dee odl ay
O ho lay dee odl lee o, lay dee odl lee o lay

[Maria:]
A prince on the bridge of a castle moat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
[Kurt:]
Men on a road with a load to tote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[the Children:]
Men in the midst of a table d'hote heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
[Maria:]
Men drinking beer with the foam afloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

One little girl in a pale pink coat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
[Brigitta:]
She yodeled back to the lonely goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[Maria:]
Soon her Mama with a gleaming gloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hee hoo
What a duet for a girl and goatherd
Maria and the Children:
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[Maria and the Children:]
Ummm (ummm) . . .
Odl lay ee (odl lay ee)
Odl lay hee hee (odl lay hee hee)
Odl lay ee . . .
. . . yodeling . . .

[Child:]
One little girl in a pale pink coat heard
[Maria:]
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hoo hoo
[Child:]
She yodeled back to the lonely goatherd
[Maria:]
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[Maria:]
Soon her Mama with a gleaming gloat heard
Lay ee odl lay ee odl lay hmm hmm
What a duet for a girl and goatherd
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[Maria and the Children:]
Happy are they lay dee olay dee lee o . . .
. . . yodeling . . .
Soon the duet will become a trio
[Maria:]
Lay ee odl lay ee odl-oo

[Maria and the Children:]
Odl lay ee, old lay ee
Odl lay hee hee, odl lay ee
Odl lay odl lay, odl lay odl lee, odl lay odl lee
Odl lay odl lay odl lay

[the Children:]
HOO!

San

[P&R Pete]

(Sshhhh! Don't let Jon see this!! He'll be moving to Borroloola)

CANBERRA (Reuters) - Prostitutes as old as 70 continue to work in rural Australia, pushed out of the cities due to strong competition from younger and more attractive sex workers, the author of a study said on Tuesday.

[2railjon]

Dennis, I can't wait for the unveiling!!!!!!

Pete, I'm counting up my frequent flyer miles right now!!!!