SERVICE MANUAL
FOR MELANCHOLIACS
Chapter One
One spring afternoon Neal MacKensie was stopped by a jacket hanging in a shop window. He stood staring through the glass, unable to leave. It wasn’t an ordinary afternoon for him. It could only be understood by having survived a cruel Vermont winter: things frozen for too long were thawing and an unfamiliar sap seemed to be mixing dangerously with his blood. It wasn’t an ordinary jacket either. Though Neal was sure of the past winter’s brutality, he was less certain of the jacket. For one thing, he couldn’t afford it; for another, it wasn’t like anything he’d ever worn before; and third, he’d been abstemious for most of the winter, and it wasn’t something you wore sober. Still—there it waited in the window above a sandy rock and next to a half-rotten cactus. The jacket cheered him up tremendously for some odd reason. The first thing that had cheered him in months, and he knew he badly needed cheering up, so he walked into the store.
“Can I help you?” she said, tall in cowboy boots and ponytail.
“That jacket.” He pointed.
“In the window? Isn’t it a beaut?”
“Is it?”
She studied him for a moment then. Unshaven, unslept, unloved. “Would you like me to get it for you?”
He nodded. She placed one boot on the window display and reached out a thin naked arm, her jeans stretching round and tight. When she held the jacket out to him, he couldn’t touch it.
“It’s a forty-two. You want to try it on?”
He nodded again, trying to smile, worried it was a lopsided grimace. His hands shook as she guided his arm into a sleeve.
She settled it correctly on his shoulders and stepped back. “Wow. That really does look good on you. Fits like tailor-made.”
He rubbed his finger tips across it reverently. Cut like a sports coat, the electric yellow chrome-tanned leather glowed like overly lit skin and was piped along its western lapels, pockets, and yoke with vibrant turquoise cloth. A row of four mother-of-pearl buttons at each sleeve and two large mother-of-pearl buttons in front reminded him of inlaid pool-table diamonds.
“Look in the mirror.” She helped him. He stood there stunned. “Nice, huh?”
The color overwhelmed him. The thing was magical, that was obvious. He felt as if he could hide behind it, as if the jacket were chain mail. “How much?”
She lifted the tag on the sleeve. “Two ninety-nine.”
“Damn.” He reluctantly started to remove it.
She touched him to wait. “Can you put a couple hundred down?”
“A couple hundred?”
She leaned closer. “We’ve had it awhile.”
“I gotta be honest with you. I’m getting on a plane to California in a few hours, and I won’t be back for a couple weeks. All I can do is fifty right now.”
She sniffed a couple times, the way someone sniffs who’s just done a line. “I guess a Western store in Burlington wasn’t the brightest idea. You want a tequila?”
“A tequila?”
She went behind the counter, and two shot glasses of amber appeared. She handed him one, downed the other.
He stared at his. After his long abstinence, the vapors hit him like a wet kiss to the tip of his penis. Of course he’d taken a vow of celibacy too.
“You’ve got to have that jacket. Can you do a hundred?”
“I shouldn’t do fifty.”
She glanced out the front window. “Okay—seventy-five.”
He threw back the shot.
Hobo Jungle
Last edited by Tramp on Thu Feb 10, 2005 9:52 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Jackie Blue
It's excellent Tramp. I've read this before, but you've re-written some. I could add a chapter to that service manual entitled "FAQ."
1. What do you do when you allow him to move in, and two months later find out that he is married and his wife and child are living in another country?
Answer: You should stop shaving and wearing makeup - that way he'll feel less homesick.
1. What do you do when you allow him to move in, and two months later find out that he is married and his wife and child are living in another country?
Answer: You should stop shaving and wearing makeup - that way he'll feel less homesick.
Tramp, If that car was brand new and we cranked up the radio, these would be the top 20:
1. Cherry Pink And Apple Blossom White, Perez Prado
2. Rock Around The Clock, Bill Haley & His Comets
3. The Ballad Of Davy Crockett, Bill Hayes
4. Autumn Leaves, Roger Williams
5. Unchained Melody, Les Baxter
6. The Yellow Rose Of Texas, Mitch Miller
7. Love Is A Many Splendored Thing, Four Aces
8. Melody Of Love, Billy Vaughn
9. Ain't That A Shame, Pat Boone
10. Dance With Me Henry, Georgia Gibbs
11. Sixteen Tons, Tennessee Ernie Ford
12. Sincerely, McGuire Sisters
13. Crazy Otto Medley I & 11, Crazy Otto
14. Learnin' The Blues, Frank Sinatra
15. Hearts Of Stone, Fontaine Sisters
16. Tweedle Dee, Georgia Gibbs
17. Moments To Remember, Four Lads
18. A Blossom Fell, Nat King Cole
19. Let Me Go Lover, Joan Weber
20. Mr. Sandman, Chordettes
And I would'nt need a beer, I would probably want a diaper change and a bottle!!!
1. Cherry Pink And Apple Blossom White, Perez Prado
2. Rock Around The Clock, Bill Haley & His Comets
3. The Ballad Of Davy Crockett, Bill Hayes
4. Autumn Leaves, Roger Williams
5. Unchained Melody, Les Baxter
6. The Yellow Rose Of Texas, Mitch Miller
7. Love Is A Many Splendored Thing, Four Aces
8. Melody Of Love, Billy Vaughn
9. Ain't That A Shame, Pat Boone
10. Dance With Me Henry, Georgia Gibbs
11. Sixteen Tons, Tennessee Ernie Ford
12. Sincerely, McGuire Sisters
13. Crazy Otto Medley I & 11, Crazy Otto
14. Learnin' The Blues, Frank Sinatra
15. Hearts Of Stone, Fontaine Sisters
16. Tweedle Dee, Georgia Gibbs
17. Moments To Remember, Four Lads
18. A Blossom Fell, Nat King Cole
19. Let Me Go Lover, Joan Weber
20. Mr. Sandman, Chordettes
And I would'nt need a beer, I would probably want a diaper change and a bottle!!!
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