Never question a Drunk!

Play nice and have fun...
Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:20 pm

MurphOnMillerAve wrote:
Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
rogruth wrote:Yes I know that we all were once beginners in our fields.


While true, most of use had good mentors while at the beginner point in our careers.


I, for one, did not.


Have you ever considered that you might just be a bit off from the bell curve?

Or, just talented?
Conservatism: The intense fear that somewhere, somehow, someone you think is inferior is being treated as your equal.

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rogruth
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby rogruth » Wed Aug 30, 2017 7:23 pm

Murph,
Yes, it was doable. Is it still doable? You found ways to get their attention. Today their electronic devices have it.
There must be places where it can still be done. However there are many places today where depriving them of
doing what they want to do is not allowed. I wonder.

I agree with Rufus.
roger

I support thread drift.
If God didn't want women to be looked at, He would have made 'em ugly. RAH

Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Thu Aug 31, 2017 7:14 am

rogruth wrote:Murph,
Yes, it was doable. Is it still doable? You found ways to get their attention. Today their electronic devices have it.
There must be places where it can still be done. However there are many places today where depriving them of
doing what they want to do is not allowed. I wonder.


I at one time had considered revisiting an academic existence sole as an adjunct to teach chemistry to the little unwashed heathens, but I figured that I probably would not last a semester before being fired for actually having the unrealistic expectations of student doing homework assignments, studying, and coming to class prepared for anything..........like unannounced exams, :wink:
Conservatism: The intense fear that somewhere, somehow, someone you think is inferior is being treated as your equal.

up148
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby up148 » Thu Aug 31, 2017 8:05 am

Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
rogruth wrote:Yes I know that we all were once beginners in our fields.


While true, most of us had good mentors while at the beginner point in our careers.


Very accurate and fortunate for some of us. The key was listening to them, realizing and accepting they knew what they were talking about. I was fortunate I found several good mentors in my lifetime for both work and life. People who were inspirational, even if they weren't perfect. But, so many of my peers just considered them old school and not in touch with the current times.....how wrong they were and many live a life that reflects that. The older we get the fewer true mentors I can find (generally older and wiser folk), because we are the older folks now. I try to remember that when talking with younger people and try not to display my radical behavior that frequently comes out on this board. And, I see good mentors on this board which makes me smile. :D

BH

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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby E7 » Sat Sep 02, 2017 11:34 am

One of my favorite Darwin awards:



Here once again are the annual Darwin Awards:



Honorable Mention



12.) According to police in Windsor, Ontario, Daniel Kolta, 27, and Randy Taylor, 33, died in a head-on collision, thus earning a tie in the game of chicken they were playing with their Snowmobiles.



11.) In Detroit, a 41-year-old man got stuck and drowned in two feet of water after squeezing head first through an 18-inch-wide sewer grate to retrieve his car keys.



10.) A 49-year-old San Francisco stockbroker accidentally jogged off a 100-foot-high cliff on his daily run.



9.) Buxton, NC: A man died on a beach when an 8-foot-deep hole he had dug into the sand caved in as he sat inside it. Beach-goers said Daniel Jones, 21, dug the hole for fun, or protection from the wind, and had been sitting in a beach chair at the bottom Thursday afternoon when it collapsed, burying him beneath 5 feet of sand. People on the beach, on the outer banks, used their hands and shovels, trying to claw their way to Jones, a resident of Woodbridge, VA, but could not reach him. It took rescue workers using heavy equipment almost an hour to free him while about 200 people looked on. Jones was pronounced dead at a hospital.



8.) Santiago Alvarado, 24, was killed in Lompoc, CA, as he fell face-first through the ceiling of bicycle shop he was burglarizing. Death was caused when the long flashlight he had placed in his mouth to keep his hands free rammed into the base of his skull as he hit the floor.



7.) According to police in Dahlonega, GA, ROTC cadet Nick Berrena, 20, was stabbed to death in January by fellow cadet Jeffrey Hoffman, 23, who was trying to prove that a knife could not penetrate the flak vest Berrena, was wearing.



6.) Sylvester Briddell, Jr., 26, was killed in Selbyville, Delaware, as he won a bet with friends who said he would not put a revolver loaded with four bullets into his mouth and pull the trigger.



5.) In Guthrie, Oklahoma, in October, Jason Heck tried to kill a millipede with a shot from his 22 caliber rifle, but the bullet ricocheted off a rock near the hole and hit pal Antonio Martinez in the head, fracturing his skull.



4.) In Elyria, Ohio, in October, Martyn Eskins, attempting to clean out cobwebs in his basement, declined to use a broom in favor of a propane torch and caused a fire that burned the first and second floors of his house.



3.) Paul Stiller, 47, was hospitalized in Andover Township, NJ, and his wife Bonnie was also injured, when a quarter-stick of dynamite blew up in their car While driving around at 2 AM, the bored couple lit the dynamite and tried to toss it out the window to see what would happen, but apparently failed to notice the window was closed



RUNNER UP: 2.) TACOMA, WA - - Kerry Bingham had been drinking with several friends when one of them said they knew a person who had bungee-jumped from the Tacoma Narrows Bridge in the middle of traffic. The conversation grew more heated and at least 10 men trooped along the walkway of the bridge at 4:30 am. Upon arrival at the midpoint of the bridge, they discovered that no one had brought a bungee rope. Bingham, who had continued drinking, volunteered and pointed out that a coil of lineman's cable lay nearby. One end of the cable was secured around Bingham's leg and the other end was tied to the bridge. His fall lasted 40 feet before the cable tightened and tore his foot off at the ankle. He miraculously survived his fall into the icy river water and was rescued by two nearby fishermen. "All I can say "said Bingham "is that God was watching out for me on that night." "There's just no other explanation for it." Bingham's foot was never located.



AND THE WINNER IS: 1.) Overzealous zookeeper Friedrich Riesfeldt (Paderborn, Germany) fed his constipated elephant, Stefan, 22 doses of animal laxative and more than a bushel of berries, figs and prunes before the plugged-up pachyderm finally let it fly, and suffocated the keeper under 200 pounds of poop Investigators say ill-fated Friedrich, 46, was attempting to give the ailing elephant an olive oil enema when the relieved beast unloaded on him. "The sheer force of the elephant's unexpected defecation knocked Mr. Riesfeldt to the ground, where he struck his head on a rock and lay unconscious as the elephant continued to evacuate his bowels on top of him" said flabbergasted Paderborn police detective Erik Dern. With no one there to help him, he lay under all that dung for at least an hour before a watchman came along, and during that time he suffocated. It seems to be just one of those freak accidents that "POOP happens."

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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Sat Sep 02, 2017 12:28 pm

Well, that was a pretty good read; now I don't feel so numbskulled. :mrgreen:
P.S. I'm assuming Mr. Briddell didn't need all four bullets. Huh.
P.P.S. It's difficult to have a favorite, but I am partial to the flashlight-in-the-mouth one. Karma counts, apparently.
"Doing wrong is like a joke to a fool." Proverbs 10: 21-28

Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Sat Sep 02, 2017 4:24 pm

The couple with the 1/2 stick of dynamite raises all sorts of additional questions, :roll: :roll: :shock: :shock: :roll: :roll:
Conservatism: The intense fear that somewhere, somehow, someone you think is inferior is being treated as your equal.

E7
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby E7 » Sat Sep 30, 2017 2:32 pm

Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night.

They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader."
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.

The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.

The older alien said, "I'd calm down if I were you."

The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting.
Again, there was no response.

Annoyed by the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said gruffly, "Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader or I will fire!"
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, "You probably don't want to do that! I really think that will make him mad.."

“Rubbish!” replied the young alien, then aimed his weapon and opened fire.

There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards him and blew the younger alien off his feet and threw him in a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away into a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head..

"What a ferocious creature!" exclaimed the young, fried alien. "He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?"

The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied, "If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you never mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear." 8)

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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Sat Sep 30, 2017 2:52 pm

Refreshing. :)

HONDO74
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby HONDO74 » Mon Oct 02, 2017 4:56 pm

After being married for 40 years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Forty years ago we had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old girl.

Now.... I have a $500,000.00 home, a $35,000.00 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 63-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up our side of things."

My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV.

Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems.

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riogrande491
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby riogrande491 » Thu Oct 05, 2017 3:06 pm

Hey, did you hear why Apple had to push back the launch of their first self-driving car, the iCrash?

Word on the street says that they are having a lot of trouble installing Windows... :lol:
Bob
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Rufus T. Firefly
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby Rufus T. Firefly » Fri Nov 03, 2017 8:07 am

Image
Conservatism: The intense fear that somewhere, somehow, someone you think is inferior is being treated as your equal.

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rogruth
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby rogruth » Fri Nov 03, 2017 11:06 am

Rio Bob & Rufus,
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
roger

I support thread drift.
If God didn't want women to be looked at, He would have made 'em ugly. RAH

E7
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby E7 » Fri Nov 03, 2017 11:41 am

Seen on a McDonald's Marquee in Texas:

"SAYING YOUR KIDS ARE FAT BECAUSE OF US IS LIKE SAYING IT'S HOOTERS FAULT YOUR HUSBAND LIKES BIG TITS!"

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MurphOnMillerAve
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Re: Never question a Drunk!

Postby MurphOnMillerAve » Fri Nov 03, 2017 4:18 pm

Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
MurphOnMillerAve wrote:
Rufus T. Firefly wrote:
While true, most of use had good mentors while at the beginner point in our careers.


I, for one, did not.


Have you ever considered that you might just be a bit off from the bell curve?

Or, just talented?

Maybe just a few bubbles off plumb. :mrgreen:


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